Brownsboro

You probably don't know this, but for four years in a row I was voted Most School Spirited at Brownsboro High School. Yep, the annual superlative awards handed out in order to have some more pages in the yearbook filled shined brightly on me for four straight years. The categories were things like "Most mischievous," "Smartest," "Most School Spirit," etc., and a male and a female were chosen for each highly prestigious award. I'm actually surprised we never had an awards ceremony for it, it was such a high honor. Television coverage would have been nice as well. But instead, picture in the yearbook. Out of my class, for the females, I'm pretty sure Sarah Oliver one it a couple of years, and Trista Pollard maybe a year or two... I can't really remember. But not me. Every year the male Most School Spirited went to me.

And here's why I was singled out so highly: I went to more school sporting events than any other person in the school. Actually, more than any other person in town, other than my dad and the coaches. I wore the Brownsboro Bear T-Shirts. I pretty much only wore Blue and Gold (our school colors.) Even today, if you've noticed, most of my clothes are Blue. Some gold. But not real gold. Yellow Gold. Which always confused me, since it's yellow. Not gold. I guess calling it gold increased the value of the ever important color of our school. But I digress.

Senior year came and an ethical dilemma arose. In order to honor the senior class for having made it through the extremely vigorous academic program of Brownsboro High School (which, by the way stands in Brownsboro, TX-- population 545,) the amount of awards given increased significantly. Now "Most School Spirited" and "Class Clown" had company with more awards such as "Most Likely to Succeed" and "Best Dressed" and "Friendliest."

Deep down I was eyeing that "Friendliest" award from the time I was reading the yearbooks as a little kid... (I was very school spirited then as well.) Maybe subconsciously that shaped my character. When you find out there's an award for the friendliest person early on, you can start practicing.

Well the voting week snuck up on us, and we all voted. The ballots were counted and something interesting happened... I won "Most School Spirit" and "Friendliest." Catch: You couldn't accept both awards. In order for it to be fair, I had to choose. On top of that, the person who was runner up for "Friendliest" (I know this because of political maneuvering on my part-- the results were supposed to be secret) was David Ulm, my Elementary and Junior High best friend. And yes, he was a very friendly guy. But we had grown apart over high school. Mainly because I had become a fundamentalist Christian dickhead-- which I actually think is the technical term for what I'd become. And he just didn't live up to the moral standards that I thought everyone should live up to. In other words, he didn't listen to D.C. Talk.

Anyway, back to the awards. I was given a choice..... "Most School Spirit" and allow a former best friend to win "Friendliest," or "Friendliest" and let someone else take away my "Most School Spirit" crown. I just did not know what to do.

In retrospect I realize what my choice really was: Loyalty vs. Niceness. To values that I hold dear. But which did I hold dearer?

I chose loyalty. How could I have parted from the title of "Most School Spirited" after three years of an amazing reign?

I think deep down I noticed something as well.... David Ulm was a much friendlier guy than I was, even though most people would have disagreed. Sure I think I was naturally friendly, but there was also a little bit of a calculating mindset within me. David was just a good guy, still is.

I think we spiritualize common virtues a bit too often. When Paul speaks of the fruit of the spirit, and when Jesus speaks of the beatitudes, aren't they really just saying "Be good. Be nice. Always calculate in favor of others. And above all, to be repetitive, just be good?"

Yeah, yeah, I know the next Christian response.... "Yeah, but we CAN'T be good on our own, we need God's spirit within us. Which I firmly believe, (although, paradoxically, there are those that don't even believe in God who are better than me in many ways.)

Things seem so much harder now.

Or easier.

Or maybe I've just run out of steam from the day to think about my great achievements much more.

By the way, if you want, I can still sing the fight song and school song from Brownsboro High School.

You want me to?

Nah, I'll spare you.